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Home | Arts & Entertainment | Humor The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you. - Rita Mae Brown For the man who has everything... Penicillin. - F. Borquin I sold my house this week. I got a pretty good price for it, but it made my landlord mad as hell. - Garry Shandling When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a redhot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity. - Albert Einstein I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell? - Homer J. Simpson If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error. - John Kenneth Galbraith A hippie is someone who looks like Tarzan, walks like Jane and smells like Cheetah. - Ronald Reagan The reason women don't play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller I want a man who's kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a millionaire? - Zsa Zsa Gabor Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones. - Mike Barfield Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invaribly they are both disappointed. - Albert Einstein Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry. - Bill Cosby If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be called research, would it? - Albert Einstein The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts. - Paul Erlich Football combines two of the worst things in American life. It is violence punctuated by committee meetings. - George Will Article Source: http://www.articlewheel.com
Aazdak Alisimo likes a good laugh just like anyone else, particularly funny quotes updated each and every day at FunnyQuotesDaily.com.
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